Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
Randomize