just ate pastrami before passing out in my hotel room. My room smells like a petting zoo
If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Randomize