Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
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