Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
Randomize