I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
I would ride that face into the sunset
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
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