Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
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