Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
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