Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
Dear drunk me, don't shave my balls til you're sober. My junk looks like a pomeranian with mange.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
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