woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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