i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
Randomize