And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize