A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
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