I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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