dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize