all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
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