its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
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