Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
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