look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
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