Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
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