Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
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