I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
I skipped work to stalk him.
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
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He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
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But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
I've spent so much time on tinder lately I just tried to left swipe an instagram photo of my neighbor
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
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