The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
You ruined the universe
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
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