I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
zippers are such a cool invention
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
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