i just bought a vibrator and the cashier says "have fun with that." i didnt realise what he said so i responded "you too." and then he gave me his number...
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
Randomize