the vacuum is drunk
what?
i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk
I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
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