Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
Randomize