your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
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