Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
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everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
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sick fucks of a feather flock together
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
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