Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Randomize