omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
Randomize