It was my first time buying condoms at the liquor store... I was nervous and there were quite a few people, so I tried to do it as quickly and quietly as possible. When I got to the Indian cashier, he took one look at them and said loudly, "Ohhh you gonna get it on tonight, ah?!"
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize