I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
Randomize