Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
Randomize