We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
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