he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
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