nut hugger
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
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