we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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