And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
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For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
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I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
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