you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Randomize