I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Randomize