in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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