It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
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