I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
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