you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
the gays at disneyland are vicious
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
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