It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
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