you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize