somebody snuck up and got me drunk
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
Also I think I drunkenly signed up to be an uber driver or something because they keep emailing me to fill out a background check
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
Got wasted in a little tiki hut by the beach yesterday. Woke up with a coconut and half of a mushroom burger in my purse. I also have a picture of our Romanian bartender's fingernails on my phone lol
Why do you always wake up with meat in your purse?
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