Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
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