Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
You called yourself Captain Aspirin and then tried to cure my headache by shoving pills up my nose. Fuck you becoming a nurse, you can't take care of me while you're drunk ever again. Ever.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
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