You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
smell my finger.
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
My vagina is officially offended.
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
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